What the doctor says:
"This should be taken care
of right away."
What the doctor is thinking:
"I'd planned a trip to Hawaii next month, but this
is so easy
and profitable that I want to fix it
before it cures itself."
What the doctor says:
"Welllllll, what have we here?"
What the doctor
is thinking:
He has no idea and is hoping you'll
give
him a clue.
"Let me check your medical history."
I want to see if you've paid your last bill before
spending any more time with you.
"We have some good news and
some bad news."
The
good news is, I'm going to buy that
new BMW. The bad news is, you're
going
to pay for it.
"Let's see how it develops."
Maybe in a few days it will grow into
something that can be cured.
"Why don't we make another appointment
later in the
week."
"I'm playing golf this afternoon, and this is a
waste of time. I need the bucks, so I'm
charging you for another office visit."
"Let me schedule you for some tests."
I have a
forty percent interest in the lab.
"I'd like to prescribe a new drug."
I'm writing
a paper and would like to use
you for a guinea pig.
"If it doesn't clear up in a week, give me a call."
I
don't know what it is. Maybe it will go away
by itself.
"That's quite a nasty looking wound."
I think I'm going to throw up.
"This
may hurt a little."
Last week two patients bit off
their tongues.
"Well,
we're not feeling so well today, are we?"
I'm stalling for time.
Who are you and why
are you here?
"This should fix you up."
The drug company slipped me some big
bucks
to prescribe this stuff.
"Everything seems to be normal."
Rats!
I guess I can't buy that new
beach condo after all.
"I'd
like to run some more tests."
I can't figure out what's wrong. Maybe
the
kid in the lab can solve this one.
"There is a lot of that going around."
That's the third one this
week! I'd better
learn something about this.
"If
those symptoms persist, call for an
appointment."
I've never heard of anything so disgusting.
Thankfully I'm
off next week.
NEXT
