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Be sure and cancel
your credit cards
before you die.
This is priceless, and so easy
to see
it happening, with customer service
being what it is today.
A lady died this past January, and
Citibank
billed her for February and
March for their annual service charges
on her credit card, and then added late
fees and
interest on the monthly charge.
The balance had been $0.00, now is
somewhere around $60.00. A family
member placed
a call to Citibank:
Family Member:
"I am calling to tell you that she died
in January."
Bank:
"The account was never closed and
the late fees and
charges still apply."
Family
Member:
"Maybe, you should turn it over
to collections."
Bank:
"Since it is two months past due,
it already has
been."
Family Member:
So, what will they do
when they
find out she is dead?"
Bank:
"Either report her account to the
frauds division or report her to
the credit bureau, maybe
both!"
Family Member:
"Do you think God will be mad at her?"
Bank:
"Excuse me?"
Family Member:
"Did you just get what I was telling you -
the
part about her being dead?"
Bank:
"Sir, you'll have to speak to my supervisor."
Supervisor gets on the phone:
Family Member:
"I'm
calling to tell you, she died in January."
Bank:
"The
account was never closed and
the late fees and charges still apply."
Family Member:
"You mean you want to collect
from her estate?"
Bank:
(Stammer) "Are you her lawyer?"
Family Member:
"No, I'm her great nephew."
(Lawyer info given)
Bank:
"Could you fax us a certificate
of death?"
Family Member:
"Sure." (fax number is given)
After they get the fax:
Bank:
"Our system just isn't set-up for death.
I don't know what
more I can do to help."
Family Member:
"Well,
if you figure it out, great!
If not, you could just keep billing her.
I don't think she will care."
Bank:
"Well, the late fees and charges
do still apply."
Family Member:
"Would
you like her new billing
address?"
Bank:
"That might help."
Family Member:
"Odessa
Memorial Cemetery,
Highway 129, Plot Number 69."
Bank:
"Sir, that's a cemetery!"
Family Member:
"What do you do with dead people
on your planet?"
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