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When I say to "move", it means go someplace else,
not switch positions
with each other so there are
still two of you in the way.
The dishes with the paw prints are yours and
contain
your food. The other dishes are mine
and contain my food.
(Please note, placing a paw print in the middle
of my
plate & food does not stake a claim for it becoming your
food & dish, nor do I find that aesthetically
pleasing
in the slightest.)
The stairway was not designed by NASCAR and
is not a racetrack.
Beating me to the bottom is
not the object. Tripping me doesn't help because
I fall faster than you can run.
I cannot buy anything bigger than a king size bed.
I am
very sorry about this. Do not think I will
continue to sleep on the couch to ensure your
comfort. Look at videos of
dogs and cats sleeping.
They can actually curl up in a ball!
It is not necessary to sleep perpendicular to each
other,
stretched out to the fullest extent possible.
(I also know, that sticking tails straight out and
having tongues
hanging out the other
end to maximize space used,
is nothing but sarcasm)
My compact discs are not miniature Frisbees.
For
the last time, there is not a secret exit from
the bathroom. If by some miracle I beat you
there and manage to get the
door shut,
it is not necessary to claw, whine, meow,
try to turn the knob, or get your paw under the
edge and try
to pull the door open.
I must exit through the same door I entered.
(In addition, I have been using the
bathroom for years...
canine or feline attendance is not mandatory.)
The proper order is kiss me, then go smell the
other dogs
or cats' butt. I cannot stress this enough.
It would be such a simple change for you.
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